The joy of spending time at malls —Pinoy Seniors

By Willie Jose

One afternoon, while I was at food court of the Scarborough Town Center enjoying my cup of brewing hot coffee that I bought at the Second Cup, my cellphone rang, Jojo Taduran, a veteran journalist, was on the line inquiring  “Nasaan ka?

Well, I said, “come over here at the Town Center and I’ll treat you to a cup of coffee”. But in a few minutes, Jojo was in front of me, holding a large cup of coffee, saying, “ How are you my friend?”

While talking about our seniors, Jojo said that some of our kababayan seniors who can afford to travel back and forth in the Philippines, it simply means a 6-month vacation back home and another six -month stay in Canada, specifically in Ontario.

“ Only in Ontario province that allows Canadians to stay outside the country in six months time, without affecting their OHIP. So most of them come back just right in time for the filing of their income taxes. For me, I would stay in the Philippines for only 1 month and a half, baka apektuhang yun pensions ko”, he said.

But what about the rest of our seniors who cannot afford that kind of lifestyle, where can we find them these days?

These cold days, some of our kababayan seniors can be seen joyfully warming themselves up and whiling away their time with their friends in what seems to be a never-ending   chatting, sipping coffee, having lunch or dinner, munching snacks and window shopping in malls and other shopping centers dotting the City of Toronto.

Even on ordinary days, one can easily spot these seniors milling around or huddling with their friends in the coffee shops and food courts of the Cederbrae Mall, Fairview Mall. Eglinton Square, Eaton Centre and the Scarborough Town Centre.

A few days ago, while I was at the Scarborough Town Center, I noticed a group of Pinoy seniors composed of three women and four men, most of them probably in their 70s lightheartedly chatting, laughing while enjoying sipping the brewed hot coffee. With the help of a walker, one woman was hopping from one table to another where her senior-friends were seated on, engaging with them in small chat, while munching some snacks.

Though, the four men were all wearing baseball caps, their white gray hairs were still visible; the elderly women’s hairs were not all white or gray but a combination of white, gray and brown colors, probably the effect of hair coloring.

I noticed two women were massaging their hands and while a guy was   stretching his arms, suddenly one of the men stood up, walked with his cane and as he walked past a group of seniors, he waved his hand, probably signaling to his friends that he was going home as it was almost past 3 in the afternoon.

While watching these things in front of my eyes, I could help thinking that these seniors truly deserve some breaks in this life now. And since they have worked hard all their lives --they should enjoy spending   time at their own choice—just to be   with their friends in the twilight of years.

In the course of my frequent visits to these shopping centers, I have met some seniors who are retired doctors, executives, media men, businessmen, ordinary workers and employees; they have confided to me their common sentiment that “ life is so boring at home” and that is the big reason why   they have to spend their time in malls.

Going to malls is also a good way to exercise their aging limbs and a positive means to re-vitalize both their mind and body. Just visualize the lively atmosphere prevailing at malls—full of people, full of life as people come and go--and for the old people, this kind of atmosphere is enough to throw away the blues.

Vince, one of the mall’s regulars, said that   although the Pinoy seniors have different groupings, they are united and solid since they have known each for a long a time.

“I come here to de-stress myself at tulungan kami dito (we help each here) although not necessarily financially, but by way of   giving encouragement and advice as we share with others our problems and other anxieties”, Vince said.

Vince also said that spending one’s time at malls is a form of   de-stressor because some of these lolos and lolas are being used as caregivers by their children and in-laws to look after their grandchildren, so going to malls is one way they can take rest and spend their day-offs from “ work”.

The seniors’ gathering in the malls also serves as an employment agency because these elderly although retired from work have still some good networking; they are always at hand to help refer people who are looking for work to some of their connections, Vince said.

Mang Sid, a former businessman, who I have known way back home, told me that while having their snacks, or sipping their cups of coffee at the food court, they could have some discussions on issues affecting the Philippines such as corruptions, politics, scams and other tidbits, adding that “ ang bisyo dito ay kuwentuhan lang”(our only vice here is sharing stories).

 But on some occasions, our kababayan seniors would have some kind of partying too either held at homes or ballrooms — dancing, potluck get together, sing-along and even out-of-town group tours.

Mang Pete Flores, 75, a former Bulletin photographer, is the favorite companion of the seniors at the Town Center for the simple reason that he’s kind, always ready and willing to use his old Cadillac car and he himself volunteering as the driver of the group for some partying.

So, next time, you meet some Pinoy seniors at the malls, just simply smile at them and say hello —kamusta na po sa inyo-and that would be enough to lift their sometimes-sagging spirit.

(Williejose1@gmail.com)

The Day our Scholarship program died

By Willie Jose

Honestly, I don’t know how I could write this piece without being affected emotionally as we—alumni of the Pamantasan ng Lungsod ng Maynila based in Toronto—are witnessing the impending end of our scholarship project— a program which has been closest to our hearts all through these years.

One Sunday afternoon last month, we gathered at Ollie Bermudez’s home in Mississauga not only to hold a Spring get together but also to discuss   who among us would be interested to be the next   president of the group.

 Of course, this gathering would not be complete without lots of chatting, greetings and some sumptuous food on the table: fried chicken, inihaw na isda, laing, sinigang na baboy labanos salad,suman and ube desserts.  

After a while, we began formally discussing who’ll be the next president of our group—the issue was finally settled when Ollie Bermudez reluctantly accepted the post, though fearing that she might be overwhelmed by the responsibilities of the office. Eventually, she calmed down when told that some of the tasks will be farmed out to rest of the alumni.

However, out of the blue, the conversation veered on the scholarship program that with our ages now--most of us are already seniors--there seems to be no option but to wind it down.

 I think the old drive is not there anymore; we have lost our steam and as they wont to say “ the spirit is willing but the flesh is weak”.

However, while discussing the winding down of this project, most of us seemed very comfortable and relax —there wasn’t so much discussion, no debate, just a simple and silent acceptance to let it go. And we were all in agreement that it’s about time we ended our scholarship program.

Regrets? None at all--- maybe because we think that we have done our best to make this project a real success.

Frankly, we had this little uneasiness ending or winding down the scholarship--it was like swallowing a bitter pill with a relaxed smile

But since most of us are either retiring or have retired from our secular work, it seems that we don’t have much choice but to accept the reality that our circumstances have changed, that we are not getting any younger.

Who knows in the near future, some younger batches of alumni might join us and infuse our group with their zest, thereby becoming instrumental in reviving this scholarship.

For so many years, this scholarship has been the epicenter of our group’s activity; we have helped hundreds of students becoming what there are now: nurses, engineers, accountants, social workers and other professionals who are now working in various fields of endeavor.

We also take pride that this scholarship, which we launched in 1995 in Toronto, has inspired other PLM alumni in San Francisco, New York, Los Angeles and Australia to set up their own scholarship projects.

However, just like any man’s death, we don’t want this scholarship to suffer an abrupt end, so we’ve decided to wind it down until the last batch of scholars have finished their courses.

For the meantime, we’ll be holding more social gatherings to strengthen our camaraderie and to find ways and means by which we can still continue helping our beloved alma mater.

 As Canadians would say, “ Anyways, Dani, have you received all the payments for our group tour in August, Eh?

It’s time to relax, folks!

.

We all long for the happy times of the Labor Press Corps

Poems in my old treasure trove

By Willie Jose

     

Once in a while I dabble in writing poems to express my feelings, my life and my love. The heart’s urging to indulge in this kind of work comes sometimes out of the blue; and when it happens, everything stops and I have to pen it right away or else my spur-of-the moment inspiration might suddenly disappear. My dear readers please allow me to enjoy this little pleasure in re-reading once more these two opuses of mine that I have found in my old treasure trove; and I hope you’ll understand because this week my wife and I are celebrating our 40^th wedding anniversary.

Wagas Na Pag-ibig

Ang aking buhay na puno ng ligalig

Sigla at liwanag ang laging niyang hatid

Labis kitang mahal. ang laging kong bangit

Sa gitna ng pighati, lungkot’t problema

Siya aking gabay at tanging pag-asa

Sumpa ko’y --habang buhay kitang kasama

Wagas na pag-ibig sa iyo’y ibinigay

Na di masusukat ng anumang bagay

Tanging yaman ko, ang pag-ibig kong tunay

Pobre man ako sa materyal na bagay

Walang karampot, mailaan man lamang

Kun’di ang pag-ibig ko na habang buhay

Sa gitna ng pangamba’t hirap ng buhay

Ako’y laging handa na ikaw’y alalayan

Ang tanging sambit ko: tayo’y magmahalan

Ilang man unos’t bagyo sapitin natin

Wagas na pag-ibig ang sandalan natin

At sa habang buhay, ikaw’t ikaw pa rin

Maging sa pagtulog, ikaw’y panaginip

Kapag kapiling ka’y, ang saya ng isip

Mithing lagi-- Oh Lilia na  aking langit

Write Your Own Poem

Once more I’m writing my poem

A poem that’s worth something or nothing at all

Would it get published; does it have a rhythm or tone?

Who cares? After all, it’s just for me and mine alone.

My poem carries the thoughts that come

from my restless consciousness

Thoughts are formless and begging to be molded

 or else they take flight and are gone no more.

What a joy seeing these thoughts becoming visible

Quickly coming to mind some fleeting moments and

memories that can easily be lost by the speed of our time

Time is gold, so write your own poem without a rhyme at all.

I’m penning this little poem early in the morning

right on the bus where most people seem visibly not moving

They look harassed, stressed out— what a sad kind of living

Then, silently I pause and wish them more of life’s blessings

Write your poem as you reflect and mediate

Ask questions, either big or small: who am I?

What’s the meaning of life? Whereto should I

go when I die? Can I draw close to my Creator?

Why is life’s success not giving us peace?

As happiness eludes us, worries instead are at our doorsteps?

Finding one’s life’s contentment is everybody’s guess.

But one need not gaze any further for the answers are here.

Draw close to Jehovah God, our Creator while there is still time

Like a thief in the night, His Day will come surprising everyone

Let’s read His Holy Writings and change our ways now

It’s now or never, for tomorrow might be late for some.

My 3-minute talk at daughter’s wedding

By Willie Jose

Getting married is one of life’s dreaded endeavors; despite doing all the needed preparations, thinking about all the ifs and other endless possibilities--the uncertainty of life brings much anxiety not only to lovebirds tying the knots but also to their respective parents.

When my youngest daughter, May got married a few months ago in Ohio, all I felt was joy and real excitement and I think I was the proudest and happiest dad, seeing my little girl and her husband, Fred lovingly caring for each other. As they went around the reception hall, thanking    their visitors--most of who had travelled afar—for joining them in celebrating and being part of their special day.

 During the reception party, May approached and told me that I would have only three minutes to say a few words in that part of the wedding when the bride’s dad is usually given a chance to say his piece. Although, I was not thinking of giving a long lecture, much less a short talk but   “ 3 minutes” is not enough to even to summarize   everything that matters—our feelings, our fond memories of May and our own anxieties.

 My daughter had been with us for almost 27 years, I didn’t know how I could squeeze everything in 3 minutes.

But that night, I had my most memorable 3-minute talk.

Despite that brief talk, now I can still remember advising my daughter, May and her husband, Fred, on the importance of making Jehovah God the center of their life; thus, they can easily cope and surmount whatever problems might come their way. And   when they sense some troubles on the horizon—pray to Him and surely He will give them the peace of mind.

Today, honestly, I can say that my family and I   are happy that our always-smiling and happy daughter has finally married, Fred, a kindhearted man whom we certainly know will always love and cherish May for the rest of her life; together they will be embarking on one of life’s most challenging endeavors —the marriage life.

Occasionally, I feel lonely and we have been missing her--she’s not around anymore to check it myself if everything’s OK with her, and also not hearing her say every morning “ Daddy, good morning”, and then she would kiss me and when she arrives home, and seeing me seating on my rocking chair, she would routinely ask me “ How are you Dad”, then she would kiss me. These are the little things that I have missing a lot. As they say in Tagalog “ Simple lang at mababaw ang kaligayahan ko “  

 I'll also miss May’s loving gestures such as when she would call and tell me, Dad you dress up and be ready I’ll pick you up and we’ll have dinner somewhere” So in short, now that she 5 hours away from us, surely there would be no more Ikki Sushi, our favorite Japanese restaurant on Kingston Road, no more Pho at Warden and no more Vei Pei. And no more the expression” Popeye the Sailor Man Tot Tot.” May loves to eat Popeye chicken

The   reality that she’s not here in our house anymore brings some feeling of   loneliness, more so when I see her former room empty. To ease that sadness, I’ve converted May’s room into my little library, so right now, I’m writing this article in her room. We’re missing   May’s “ noise” because normally when she sees   a whole chicken on our dining table, she would excitedly say“ OH Chicken”— and that's her favorite dish.

 Now we cook less and buy less; we ‘ve gotten rid of our chest freezer, seeing no need for stocking up foods. And when May left our home, that was the only time, when I thought to myself that “ maybe in the near future, we might sell our house, Lilia and I would have to move to a smaller house. For the first time in my life, this life’s downgrading idea has crossed my mind.

OH, how we miss our loving daughter. May, see you soon in Ohio!